RD1: Unfukwitable vs. H Dot Verseman (OPEN FOR VOTES)

[Wuxia]

Regular Battle
Verses due NO DUE DATES*
Voting ends on NO DUE DATES*

Must check-in 24/48 hours for NO DUE DATES to take effect
*be reasonable

10-lines MAX Regular Battle
16-lines MAX Contendership and Championship Battle


You know the rules, if not, refer to the rule thread.

@Unfukwitable
@H Dot Verseman

[Unfukwitable]

Check

[H Dot Verseman]

check- how about wednesday 11:59 est time? 10 lines good?

[H Dot Verseman]

I might walk with a limp, but watch me flip the table
In a fit of rage you'll see a hidden blade from within the cane killing 'Able
I'm a veteran of these here written texts
The site seems to be a little dry off the top...no wonder why everyone is picking Heads
I'm head and shoulders above and the blitzkriegs coming
Please believe I got dirt on you, and there's six feet of it
There's no two ways, I'm gifted at rap
While you've achieved nothing with your recent strikes like the Iranian missile attacks
Giving him dap why, I spit bolder....
I'm not merely winning, I'm beating the pants off you like strip poker

[Unfukwitable]

Ima kill you & flee the state.. Clips burstin you is troublesome ,
I never had to take a page out of your book to RIP Verse & do a coverup.
Sniper Rifle Killer gon be the caption with my face In the Article,
“Once Eye Zero-In On dot” & get Atom he’ll be nothing but particles.
Faggot you gon need a pacemaker when Fo’s spark,
Put full metal jackets to a crossdresser he’ll have a Chrome heart
Modified my new hammers APPLIED MATICS WITH A BEAM,
I can “Switch Locations for Ages” I made a TIME TRAVELING MACHINE!
Ima kill u in fashion U ain’t a Champ this lame needs help,
A Title!? pfft! Even Hermes regrets giving H get the belt!

[Jack Hallows]

yessssssssssssssssss!!!

just a preface, this was probably my most anticipated match cuz i’ve seen what both are capable of previously & niggas already know i have history with Verseman, but Unfukwitable was a favorite of mine entering the tourney as someone who is new to me.

that said, this battle did NOT disappoint. let’s go:

from the top, both starting punches were haymakers. Unfwit’s was clever but that Cane & Able line was straight Biblical. LOTB for me.

picking heads, dry top was a dope concept, but Unfwit’s set up leading into the atom wordplay was fireeee.

the next 3 bars were the decisive ones for me cuz at this point they were aaalmost even.

the dirt on you concept has been around but the way it was executed here was cool. probly my least favorite line. funny cuz i feel the same way about Unfwit’s bar here too. was kinda forced.

still kinda even, next lines are important.

then boom. current event bar vs another gun bar. the Iranian missile strike line was fucking fire & i’m pissed off cuz if i had used my original verse in my battle, i could’ve used mine 1st & now i can’t use it anymore lmao. fuck you Headless. Unfwit’s gun bar was fun due to the multi syllabic structure, which i love, but it didn’t hit hard. it seemed more of a general gun bar that could be used in a verse anywhere be it a battle or an open mic, so i wasn’t as impactful compared to it’s counter bar up top.

closer bars were funny cuz they both involved clothes. wonder if it was intentional or just ironic. either way, both were quotable and evenly matched blows. both made me laugh a bit.

in the end, Hdot was more consistent & had a varied topic pool as far as punch angles go. Unfwit’s reliance on gun bars was more of a hamper here for him, even though he has some wildly entertaining gun antics lol. the deciding factor for me was the opener, which started HDV off with a decisive lead, and solidified it with the 4th bar.

both came with guns loaded, so to speak, but at the end of the bout, only one had more direct hits scored & that’s why my vote goes to

Headless Verseman for the win.

Howl.

[bare ryu]

verseman
I might walk with a limp, but watch me flip the table
In a fit of rage you'll see a hidden blade from within the cane killing 'Able
- this was clean. only nitpicking because orally the flip doesnt work as well but i liked the opener regardless
I'm a veteran of these here written texts
The site seems to be a little dry off the top...no wonder why everyone is picking Heads
- cool jab, not a lot of sting since its not too direct but its not a minus
I'm head and shoulders above and the blitzkriegs coming
Please believe I got dirt on you, and there's six feet of it
- another clean punch as well
There's no two ways, I'm gifted at rap
While you've achieved nothing with your recent strikes like the Iranian missile attacks
- like the relevant reference. solid punch
Giving him dap why, I spit bolder....
I'm not merely winning, I'm beating the pants off you like strip poker
- no one's said #pause yet so i got u. would have liked a more direct hit with the closer

unfuk
Ima kill you & flee the state.. Clips burstin you is troublesome ,
I never had to take a page out of your book to RIP Verse & do a coverup.
- cool personal angle. idk if theres any backstory to this so im just taking it at face value. good opener
Sniper Rifle Killer gon be the caption with my face In the Article,
“Once Eye Zero-In On dot” & get Atom he’ll be nothing but particles.
- i think the wordplay could have still held up if u didnt do the eye/I wordplay, but the angle is cool and the execution was solid. just a bit superfluous with the eye wordplay
Faggot you gon need a pacemaker when Fo’s spark,
Put full metal jackets to a crossdresser he’ll have a Chrome heart
- fresh angle just a bit indirect
Modified my new hammers APPLIED MATICS WITH A BEAM,
I can “Switch Locations for Ages” I made a TIME TRAVELING MACHINE!
- slick wordplay but doesnt feel like its directed at him, reads like a cypher bar
Ima kill u in fashion U ain’t a Champ this lame needs help,
A Title!? pfft! Even Hermes regrets giving H get the belt!
- i see the concept but its not landing because of the wording at the end

ill do a bar for bar breakdown
opener - unfuk. probably strongest bar to bar matchup, i liked to both angles but i think unfuks was develped just slightly more
2 - verse. again another strong comparison but unfuk's superfluous wordplay held it back a bit
3 - unfuk. a bit of a fresher angle. feel like dirt/grave angle is more played
4 - verse. more direct with a relevant reference
closer - unfuk. wasnt too sold on either for differing reasons, i prefer closers with a more personal touch to really seal the deal. i think verse's concept was cool but just felt like a general bar. unfuk's wording wasn't the cleanest but u could gather what he was trying to say. this was bc there were a lot of ways unfuk worked his concept into the set up for the final punch.

close battle fellas, mad respect to both of u guys.
mvgt - unfuk

[H Dot Verseman]

1-1

[TheShaman]

I'll give it to H Dot. I think it was more clean overall. The first bar had a nice flow and the picking heads punchline was good. Unfukwitable's verse was too jumbled and reachy, imo. Like the very first bar: "Ima kill you & flee the state.. Clips burstin you is troublesome". There's not really a connection between these things, and the setup rhyme feels very unnatural. The RIP Verse idea was good, but could have stood alone and been better executed, imo. Also stuff like “Once Eye Zero-In On dot”, I don't get this way of writing. "Once I zero in on Dot" would have been just as effective to convey the point. I feel like it's trying to seem like more than it is. But anyway..

Vote: H Dot.

[HeadlessVerseman]

I'm winning 2-1

[Dimes07]

I might walk with a limp, but watch me flip the table
In a fit of rage you'll see a hidden blade from within the cane killing 'Able

DAMN that is dope

I'm a veteran of these here written texts
The site seems to be a little dry off the top...no wonder why everyone is picking Heads

okay
I'm head and shoulders above and the blitzkriegs coming
Please believe I got dirt on you, and there's six feet of it

played concept

There's no two ways, I'm gifted at rap
While you've achieved nothing with your recent strikes like the Iranian missile attacks

really cool and relevant

Giving him dap why, I spit bolder....
I'm not merely winning, I'm beating the pants off you like strip poker

Overall- not bad. Two really dope lines, the rest were alright.

Ima kill you & flee the state.. Clips burstin you is troublesome ,
I never had to take a page out of your book to RIP Verse & do a coverup.

very stretched name flip

Sniper Rifle Killer gon be the caption with my face In the Article,
“Once Eye Zero-In On dot” & get Atom he’ll be nothing but particles.

good concept worded weird

Faggot you gon need a pacemaker when Fo’s spark,
Put full metal jackets to a crossdresser he’ll have a Chrome heart

gay

Modified my new hammers APPLIED MATICS WITH A BEAM,
I can “Switch Locations for Ages” I made a TIME TRAVELING MACHINE!

nah

Ima kill u in fashion U ain’t a Champ this lame needs help,
A Title!? pfft! Even Hermes regrets giving H get the belt!

seems like you read his closer and tried a similar clothing line but not as dope or interesting.



Vote H Dot Verseman

DIMES

[mal diction]

I might walk with a limp, but watch me flip the table
In a fit of rage you'll see a hidden blade from within the cane killing 'Able
str8... i like this


I'm a veteran of these here written texts
The site seems to be a little dry off the top...no wonder why everyone is picking Heads
who's heads... could be better

I'm head and shoulders above and the blitzkriegs coming
Please believe I got dirt on you, and there's six feet of it
str8...


There's no two ways, I'm gifted at rap
While you've achieved nothing with your recent strikes like the Iranian missile attacks
iight


Giving him dap why, I spit bolder....
I'm not merely winning, I'm beating the pants off you like strip poker
pause ... didnt like this one


vs



Ima kill you & flee the state.. Clips burstin you is troublesome ,
I never had to take a page out of your book to RIP Verse & do a coverup.
didnt like this

Sniper Rifle Killer gon be the caption with my face In the Article,
“Once Eye Zero-In On dot” & get Atom he’ll be nothing but particles.
dope!!!

Faggot you gon need a pacemaker when Fo’s spark,
Put full metal jackets to a crossdresser he’ll have a Chrome heart
nah

Modified my new hammers APPLIED MATICS WITH A BEAM,
I can “Switch Locations for Ages” I made a TIME TRAVELING MACHINE!
not this one either

Ima kill u in fashion U ain’t a Champ this lame needs help,
A Title!? pfft! Even Hermes regrets giving H get the belt!
is this a typo...



well i got H dot ahead... better puns...maybe UnF needs to proofread his verse before postin

v-H dot

[Unfukwitable]

Check all these noob accounts ips

[Mimic]

Honestly.
What have these battles come to lmao.